Reality Check...

This week, watching my child learn how to handle discrimination, authority-wielding liars, jealousy and a variety of other 'lifeskills' has been such a double-edged sword.

I have always stuck to the

"Life ain't fair, princess, so deal."

addage.

I've been tough on them, expecting them to handle what life throws at them.

I don't step in when someone hurts their feelings. I don't call parents and 'fix' something between our children. I don't reprimand their kids. (One exception, however, would be if an adult were to harm, either phsyically or mentally or spiritually. Other than that----I say "Handle it.")

It ain't easy.

My heart squeezes with sadness that they must experience this

to survive in this world.

More than survive... to rise above all the yuk in this world.

That being said....

I do give my kids solicited-only advice, open ears, broad shoulders, and a safe place to fall.

I've had plenty of people discount the amount of 'real' experience with this, since we homeschool.

Baloney.

Bullies and Jerks

exist EVERYWHERE and no one is immune.

Period.

What parent DOESN'T agonize when their child is hurting because of another's selfishness?

What parent DOESN'T want to shake the other kid's head off for hurting their child?

What parent DOESN'T experience tangible pain when someone 'uses' their child?

What parent DOESN'T plot ways to annonymously do damage to said child's parents brand new car for their refusal to pay attention to the damage their kids do to another's?

But...

The pay-off is so sweet, when your child--when faced with adults who are bullies, or jerks--

offers forgiveness and temperance, despite every right to retaliate.

Life is hard... and watching my kids go through these things is WAYYY harder than going through them myself. It's torture.

But today... I am proud. I am humbled. I am grateful for her wonderful example.

**********

"Bullying takes so many different forms that, frankly, it's hard to recognize all the time. But it is very important for us to deal with this."~~Michael Hanson

“Never be bullied into silence. Never allow yourself to be made a victim. Accept no one's definition of your life; define yourself.”~~Harvey Fierstein