The one where I wonder where my hutzpah is...

Occasionally I find myself in situations, in which I have every intention of portraying the total confidence and secureness I feel in myself.....
when I come off sounding like an insecure teenager.

Why is that??

I'm an educated 40 year old woman, and pretty much know what I want (not that I'm always successful in getting it) and there are moments, thank heavens they're more rare, when I launch into a nervous giggle and hem-n-haw about something I want or need.

I HATE that.
HATE. it.

I didn't feel lame and insecure when I started, but by the time I walked away from the situation, I feel my mouth turn acrid with the need to throw up.... as I mentally shake my head and even wince at the replay of the conversation.

I wouldn't even take me seriously, even though I know what I meant.

I don't know how to combat such ridiculous scenarios... because by the time I realize I'm coming off insecure and lame... I'm walking away.

Meh.


"When you accept yourself completely you do not have to maintain a phony front, drive yourself to ''achieve'' or feel insecure if people tune-in to you and what you are doing."
Ken S. Keyes

Comments

Candace said…
i thought I was the only one who did that. I'm glad i'm in the same boat with a wonderful woman that i look up too. i feel more comforted...i don't know if you do...but i do. thanks.
Lammy said…
I imagine a lot of people do that, but I hate that I do.
*sigh*
Oh well.
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